Cognitive Seeds

It is after midnight. I am experiencing complex partial seizures, the first I have experienced at this level since increasing my dose of Keppra to 3,000 mg per day. My symptoms are typical of my previous complex partial seizures. I am experiencing a sense of derealization. I am a hostage to fear. I am falling down the rabbit hole.

A neural storm has scattered and shattered my emotions. Newly sprouted cognitive seeds give life to photonic phantoms which sprout and grow before my eyes.

 

The world is too fast, too loud.   A single point of time, a single memory, is creeping in on a wave of ictal fear. I am choking and drowning in experiential hallucinations.

My higher cognitive functions are totally fucked.

I am experiencing a single point of time. Not a second of time, not a snapshot, a single point. In essence, though, my temporal neocortex, perhaps more specifically my Amygdala, have turned this point into the inexplicable. It is EVERYTHING.  It is a universe onto itself. It is omnipresent and omnipotent. I am overwhelmed, engulfed, my brain has gone supernova and sucked me into a cognitive black hole.